The Demotivational Tour 2011 - Part 2. Alton Towers
- Thread starter furie
- Start date
Nemesis Inferno
Strata Poster
I've seen some great TRs, but this one is awesome :lol:
I'll stick mine in here as well...
So I woke up at 8:30 much to the displeasure of myself but left the house at 9:00 in the Peugeot of Blue to get to the Towers... A rather uneventful trip that involved loud Bullet for my Valentine times was punctuated by random car stalling then restarting outside JCB... Which gave me something to think about as I entered the Monorail at 9:45...
As I entered and reached the end of Towers Street the hordes were let in and as Will hadn't arrived (And his were the only contact details I had), I went to Nemesis alone...
I was welcomed fully by the beast with an empty queue, so went on the front, then the back, then the middle twice, then the back one last time in the space of 30 minutes... What an awesome start to the day and made me exceptionally happy...
I got a drink in the AP flask and decided to wander towards Duel as rain was approaching, but was thwarted by Will ringing me, so I changed my direction back towards the Skyride and had my own personal carriage back to Towers Street to meet up with the group...
After Rach had AP faffed, the first ride was elected... to be Nemesis... I was rather blergh about it, so decided to sit it out with Phil, who went off to get pictures as mentioned above... Eventually people returned and we baulked at Air (though Steph and some went to use the band, though they were told to come back at 1 for... some reason...), so went off to Duel...
Duel was fun, only 2nd though for me, but getting 45000 in a full car is pretty decent imo... Also gave me a chance to look at the new bits and they are quite fun and give a bit more motion to an otherwise boring room... Also trying to impersonate Tomb Blaster annoying noise as well as Duel Live provided some added bonus entertainment between me and Will...
After Duel, we headed off towards Oblivion via Hollow of Hauntedness, with a lack of Duel noise, which infuriated Will more than constant references to Friday and Essex... Regardless, we reached Blivvy to be greeted by a long queue... So joy... First time I've queued for it like that tbh but was a fun time with everyone involved...
Afterwards we split for lunch and me, Will, Tom and Rach went to Woodcutters for BBQ ribs based times, which were fab and after some more faff outside by the fountain Hexy Wex was the elected ride to go to, as Thirteen was dead and Rita is ****... And it was it's usual awesome self... Love Hex and it didn't disappoint today... YAY
Maddie and Ciall then wanted to get wet so went on Battle Galleons, not before bumping into Hixee, cleverly hiding in a Duelling Dragons shirt... Hiding from us in plain site if you will... Onto Battle Galleons us non-riders had to settle for randomers as they were put on the side facing away from all the pathways, Will was left to aim at random people and proceeded to get rather wet himself, moreso than our main targets... Upset
Then everyone bar me, Will, Tom, Rach, Steph and Kieran went on Flume whilst we hit up Sea-Life, which now has a Nurse Shark... And that's it... At this point Rach departed the day whilst we then went to play "That's NOT them" at the Flume exit...
This eventually changed into "That's NOT OUR Maddie" after a short time... Flume is bloody long though... Jesus...
Eventually our Maddie (and the rest) turned up and we went to the Rapids of wetness... But not before seeing the bane of Towers... SHAWN SANBROOKE! Actually working for a change in the photo thing in Mutiny Bay... After walking past saying we had better things to do than interact with him in subtle ways, we reached the Rapids, where I forgot how much difference 8 people in a boat make... Lots of wet times involving my arse happened and waterfalls... Was not impressed...
Runaway Train followed on and was it's usual self... Not a lot to say, but the queue does move a lot quicker than people think... Wow...
At this point we only had much time for one more ride, so it was back to Oblivion and a shorted (more regular) queue to which more faff and poor batching happened and so the day ended... With not a Martyn H in sight <3
We left Ciall to meet said person and elected that Monorail queue was not a good idea and walked back to the car park after an awesome day...
Even though it was busy, I really enjoyed the day... It's gotten me back into the mood of meets to be quite honest... I'm looking forward to the Live in May and it'll hopefully meet my expectations...
And before I go...
"Welcome, to the unknown... Welcome to eternal darkness... WELCOME... TO MILTON KEYNES!"
I'll stick mine in here as well...
So I woke up at 8:30 much to the displeasure of myself but left the house at 9:00 in the Peugeot of Blue to get to the Towers... A rather uneventful trip that involved loud Bullet for my Valentine times was punctuated by random car stalling then restarting outside JCB... Which gave me something to think about as I entered the Monorail at 9:45...
As I entered and reached the end of Towers Street the hordes were let in and as Will hadn't arrived (And his were the only contact details I had), I went to Nemesis alone...
I was welcomed fully by the beast with an empty queue, so went on the front, then the back, then the middle twice, then the back one last time in the space of 30 minutes... What an awesome start to the day and made me exceptionally happy...
I got a drink in the AP flask and decided to wander towards Duel as rain was approaching, but was thwarted by Will ringing me, so I changed my direction back towards the Skyride and had my own personal carriage back to Towers Street to meet up with the group...
After Rach had AP faffed, the first ride was elected... to be Nemesis... I was rather blergh about it, so decided to sit it out with Phil, who went off to get pictures as mentioned above... Eventually people returned and we baulked at Air (though Steph and some went to use the band, though they were told to come back at 1 for... some reason...), so went off to Duel...
Duel was fun, only 2nd though for me, but getting 45000 in a full car is pretty decent imo... Also gave me a chance to look at the new bits and they are quite fun and give a bit more motion to an otherwise boring room... Also trying to impersonate Tomb Blaster annoying noise as well as Duel Live provided some added bonus entertainment between me and Will...
After Duel, we headed off towards Oblivion via Hollow of Hauntedness, with a lack of Duel noise, which infuriated Will more than constant references to Friday and Essex... Regardless, we reached Blivvy to be greeted by a long queue... So joy... First time I've queued for it like that tbh but was a fun time with everyone involved...
Afterwards we split for lunch and me, Will, Tom and Rach went to Woodcutters for BBQ ribs based times, which were fab and after some more faff outside by the fountain Hexy Wex was the elected ride to go to, as Thirteen was dead and Rita is ****... And it was it's usual awesome self... Love Hex and it didn't disappoint today... YAY
Maddie and Ciall then wanted to get wet so went on Battle Galleons, not before bumping into Hixee, cleverly hiding in a Duelling Dragons shirt... Hiding from us in plain site if you will... Onto Battle Galleons us non-riders had to settle for randomers as they were put on the side facing away from all the pathways, Will was left to aim at random people and proceeded to get rather wet himself, moreso than our main targets... Upset
Then everyone bar me, Will, Tom, Rach, Steph and Kieran went on Flume whilst we hit up Sea-Life, which now has a Nurse Shark... And that's it... At this point Rach departed the day whilst we then went to play "That's NOT them" at the Flume exit...
This eventually changed into "That's NOT OUR Maddie" after a short time... Flume is bloody long though... Jesus...
Eventually our Maddie (and the rest) turned up and we went to the Rapids of wetness... But not before seeing the bane of Towers... SHAWN SANBROOKE! Actually working for a change in the photo thing in Mutiny Bay... After walking past saying we had better things to do than interact with him in subtle ways, we reached the Rapids, where I forgot how much difference 8 people in a boat make... Lots of wet times involving my arse happened and waterfalls... Was not impressed...
Runaway Train followed on and was it's usual self... Not a lot to say, but the queue does move a lot quicker than people think... Wow...
At this point we only had much time for one more ride, so it was back to Oblivion and a shorted (more regular) queue to which more faff and poor batching happened and so the day ended... With not a Martyn H in sight <3
We left Ciall to meet said person and elected that Monorail queue was not a good idea and walked back to the car park after an awesome day...
Even though it was busy, I really enjoyed the day... It's gotten me back into the mood of meets to be quite honest... I'm looking forward to the Live in May and it'll hopefully meet my expectations...
And before I go...
"Welcome, to the unknown... Welcome to eternal darkness... WELCOME... TO MILTON KEYNES!"
Will
Strata Poster
Yay
Right, Benin's done the basic outline, I'll have a go at fleshing this out a bit, because yesterday was made of awesome Though only one of you is online to appreciate this, and this is disappont.
Despite the best efforts of the Satnav (the decision to take it literally and turn right, then left, may have been the last I ever made since it left me on a slip road to the wrong carriageway of the A500!!!), I made it to Stoke station from which Rach & Tom were quickly rescued, and from there on we braved speed limits and the windy roads and inevitable traffic jams of Cotton, Alton and Farley until the Towers were reached From here, there was some 'navigating off road' to be done, leading to confusion and a nice empty hotel car park
The monorail had a stupid queue, thus the three of us trekked to the entrance, and after I made it into the park, a group including Furies, Benin, Maddie and the infamous CIALLKENNETT was switfly assembled. The times, they were good.
And they'd get better, for our first destination was the UK's finest, regardless of what Tom & Rach attempted to persuade us. The day seemed busier than I'd have liked, and drizzle had descended, so the queue was 20 minutes or so, but there were lots of people to be amused by, so it passed pleasantly fast and the end goal of my second good coaster of 2011 was acheived, despite Maddie's attempts to thwart me by picking Row 3 for us - if it's that good first thing in mid-train, this is going to be another great year for Nemesis <3
We now wandered to Air for those with 'spacker bands' - but apparently these were only being accepted at 1PM, which made no sense - but I found a rock to sit on, a couple of people to annoy and muffins upon which to munch, so I was in my element regardless of nobody riding the tedious flying coaster.
Duel, naturally followed as it's probably the best of the park's family rides (the second best dark ride in the country? I'll have to give that one some thought...) - everyone was better at it than me, but I was far from perturbed. The head in the THING seemed to perturb Maddie however, but as Benin said, I was more disturbed by irksome noises than reminded us of Chessington last weekend, uninvited raven-headed banshees and the fact that it was April and not October, as I'm already counting the days to Scarefest It's also to be noted that Ciaran's become still more amusing, and his oversized Dream Theater t-shirt shall only multiply this further. I had one too
After the joys of Duel, we began the extensive trek to Oblivion (my pedometer is pleased to note we covered over 15,000 steps during our time in the park!) via the Haunted Hollow - which was useless owing to the fact that the thing in there which makes the best noise was broken. And it was light. C'est la vie. There was also the inevitable amount of amusing conversation which resulted from the group being as well-balanced as it was, and this continued well into the depths of a lengthy Oblivion queue during which in-jokes with Maddie had me in hysterics on a number of occasions and bad music and bad people were severely spited. Rocco? Whyyyyyyy? As for Oblivion, well, it went up and then it went down again rather faster - there was excessive mist and a certain amount of joltiness, which happily blotted out an assortment of Northern screams.
The two best coasters in England had been thoroughly appreciated, and some zombies had had the **** blasted out of them - the day was going extremely well, but how to improve on this? It being 1PM, the answer was obvious; lunch at the Woodcutter's Grill While Benin's overtaking strategies prove he thinks he's Kamui Kobayashi, Rach is awesome, and in exchange for my slight detour in the morning (and associated brush with death) bought me lunch - this involved JD glazed ribs, and ****ing amazing ribs they were too, untainted by Merlin's genetically modified tomatoes unlike nearly everyone else's food appeared to be. As soon as I'd managed to rid the table of mayonnaise and coleslaw and acquire the all-important vinegar, feasting could begin. I stand by my comment that there's nobody in my phone book worth interrupting those ribs for, such was my enjoyment of them (Tom similarly enjoyed non-driving; it meant lager could feature), but Furie eventually managed to track us down, then went to enjoy a picnic involving pasties, caramel shortcake, sausage rolls and the requisite red drink by the fountain outside.
At length, 4 sighs of full-stomached contentment ensued, the lingering JD sauce was wiped from a pair of mouths, and we went outside to join them. Ciall and Maddie were also outside, talking about Nickelback, Biffy Clyro, Pendulum, Manchester United and far too many additional sins to mention. This displeased me, and justice was swiftly delivered. Unfortunately, while I was preoccupied shunning the non-believers, Th13teen had felt fit to close, adding further fuel to the fires of my displeasure - it wasn't October, but myself and a few others were still quite looking forward to meeting the other one-drop wonder again. I wasn't looking forward to Rita however; so we didn't go on it, and the world was nearly as smiley as it had been when I was confronted with my rackofribs <3
Instead, Hex happened - a conversation on lacklustre horror films (it seemed impossible to find one Ciaran's small friend actually liked!) and quite a bit of shouting brought us through the now wonderfully short queue line and into the preshow room. More than one of us would continue to provide volume over the top of the video we'd all seen a million times, while I'd also disrupt the ambience of the vault, having found Maddie's tale of scare-actors promoting the 'Gothic Mansion #4' scent disproportionately entertaining 5 minutes or so after she'd told it From hereon, Ciall began with his inpenetrable Inception quoting, leading to my own tales of semi-lucid dreaming, which threatened to invade the ride itself. The music was awesome, the ride was a lot of fun, and the expressions on the faces of first-time riders were priceless. Would now be a good time to mention that I like Hex, and I like Alton a lot.
We emerged, blinking in the sunlight [lol, j/k...] a few minutes later, ready to decide what to do with the remainder of the afternoon. With Th13teen closed, options seemed oddly limited, and decisions were not forthcoming, so we began to walk in the direction of the piratey bit, and Maddie & Ciall decided to ride the splash battle. Bizarrely, it turned out that they were serious... and obviously the sun WAS peeking through at last, because I know I felt fit to get involved with the water cannons in a BIG way. There was disappointment with a lack of eligible people to thoroughly dishevel, though victimizing the one person who looked LEAST like they wanted to get wet proved an enjoyable strategy. Alas, there were also large men who were a LOT better with the cannons than me, meaning my jeans left the ride area sporting a level of wetness Mr. Kennett would have been proud of. Maddie & Ciall for their part were on the wrong side of the boat, meaning their follow occupants received a drenching intended for them. Meh. Honourable mention to the small child who'd thought to find a BUCKET, with which he was severely drowning hapless passers-by, Ciaran included; at least until he decided to leave the boat in order to do so. Silly child.
By now, I was more than wet enough, and decided that while it wasn't the best water-themed activity, Sealife was still preferable to getting any wetter on the Flume, so the group split, myself, Rach, Tom, Benin and Ciaran opting for fish based activities. Alas, my concentration span wasn't at its best today, so remembering the hilarity of May 2009 (while conveniently forgetting other aspects of it :evil cleaner-shrimps were chosen over spider crabs of tedium. However, the cleaner shrimps were still more disinterested than me, none in any touch pool seemed to want anything to do with anyone's hands. And we weren't allowed to bother the horseshoe crabs, disappointingly. There were also fish, many of them, some of them jellyfish, and others small barracudas. A few moments post-GHOSTSOFTHESEA, the Sealife centre was left, and a fun game of shouting 'THAT'S not Maddie' at every boat which did not contain Maddie (and... there were many) ensued. There was also a Shawn Sandcastle to evade, alas. Many flume boats later, the group was reunited (sans Rach, who’d alas departed early after a long goodbye causing me to knock things over in the shop mid purchase of expensive diet coke) and an escape bid by Furie’s batteries following a pocket failure was thwarted by a surprisingly athletic Will!
As though Ciall or a British Summer were dictating the routine, the theme of wetness persisted, and the Rapids were our next port of call, Furie alas having to sit this one out due to insufficient boat size. The queue was again lengthy, so people including but not limited to James Labrie, Megan Prescott, the entirety of Manchester and Ollie once more had to endure my verbal rampage. The ride, for its not inconsiderable part, delivered a satisfying level of dampness on my side of the boat, and rather more on the others – it also seemed to go on FOREVER, just as it had done at my second Alton Live precisely 6 years ago on Saturday.
Despite my loudly protested preferences, we went on the Mine Train next, and it had a queue of frustration. It’s better than Chessington’s (but not Europa’s, due to lack of spice cave) and thus even the brand of amusement provided by Benin, Maddie and Ciall’s insistence on having the front car could not go far towards redeeming it. ‘Mergh’ was remarked, and again, photos displeased. There were strange things in the shop, these included Furie.
Uncertainty took a hold of us once again at this point, until someone made the wise decision that Oblivion was the manner in which our day should end, and a long walk followed by a much shorter queue regardless of more useless batching (I forget the quote, but I know it was priceless!) and better ride (front row FTW) followed. Doubtless there were antics, but many of the group, myself were flagging by this point and thus my memories are alas as hazy as they are happy. Family_furie were met once again outside the ride, complete with smaller (and larger) people, and enjoying yet another picnic, which featured cornflake cakes. I’ve put far too much emphasis on food in this report, amusingly. Anyway, there was brief faffing with them before, flanked by Benin, Tom and Maddie who’d be joining me for a hair-raising return journey to the loathsome legions of Lee… (dammit) Stoke, despite Tom’s apparent desire to detour to Rhyl!
An upsettingly long queue for the monorail that I might not have been awake by the end by meant that walking was the way forward again until we parted ways with Benin at the other monorail station, and easily found the Clio of JOY in carpark F, booted up Emily and commenced a ludicrous trek to Stoke, which was spited by bus of SLOW, but greatly improved by Dream Theater, banter and Maddie moreorless falling asleep. Thinking about it, my driving instructor told me a standard at which my passengers were relaxed enough to fall asleep was one to aim for, so that one’s for you, Paul!
So, there you have it – I know I’ve skipped more details than I’ve included, and that wasn’t up to my usual standard (or length!!) but the day really was, and then some; in terms of random Alton meets, that might even compare to the legendary Halloween meet of 2009, and as I’ve set before, it was exactly what I needed to round off this weird and less than wonderful week in the wondrous world of Will. I have odd moments of wondering why I stick around this place, as it does my ****ing head in sometimes, but days like yesterday do more than remind me of why anyone trying to get rid the site of me is in for a long wait! The rides, brilliant though they were at the UK’s finest (was there anywhere British I’d rather have spent yesterday? Probably not) once more took an airtime-filled backseat to the company, so yet another resounding thank you to those that turned up (Yeah, even you Ciall, especially since you so admirably dispatched with Martyn!) and ensured the laughter and antics were as without end as they’ve been on any trip involving CF over the last 6 months. Lots and lots of superlatives for you, the park and the day, give yourselves pats on the back of awesomeness. 12 hours sleep last night was as enjoyed as it was due
This story ends where it began: Yay
Right, Benin's done the basic outline, I'll have a go at fleshing this out a bit, because yesterday was made of awesome
Though only one of you is online to appreciate this, and this is disappont.Despite the best efforts of the Satnav (the decision to take it literally and turn right, then left, may have been the last I ever made since it left me on a slip road to the wrong carriageway of the A500!!!), I made it to Stoke station from which Rach & Tom were quickly rescued, and from there on we braved speed limits and the windy roads and inevitable traffic jams of Cotton, Alton and Farley until the Towers were reached
From here, there was some 'navigating off road' to be done, leading to confusion and a nice empty hotel car park The monorail had a stupid queue, thus the three of us trekked to the entrance, and after I made it into the park, a group including Furies, Benin, Maddie and the infamous CIALLKENNETT was switfly assembled. The times, they were good.
And they'd get better, for our first destination was the UK's finest, regardless of what Tom & Rach attempted to persuade us. The day seemed busier than I'd have liked, and drizzle had descended, so the queue was 20 minutes or so, but there were lots of people to be amused by, so it passed pleasantly fast and the end goal of my second good coaster of 2011 was acheived, despite Maddie's attempts to thwart me by picking Row 3 for us - if it's that good first thing in mid-train, this is going to be another great year for Nemesis <3
We now wandered to Air for those with 'spacker bands' - but apparently these were only being accepted at 1PM, which made no sense - but I found a rock to sit on, a couple of people to annoy and muffins upon which to munch, so I was in my element regardless of nobody riding the tedious flying coaster.
Duel, naturally followed as it's probably the best of the park's family rides (the second best dark ride in the country? I'll have to give that one some thought...) - everyone was better at it than me, but I was far from perturbed. The head in the THING seemed to perturb Maddie however, but as Benin said, I was more disturbed by irksome noises than reminded us of Chessington last weekend, uninvited raven-headed banshees and the fact that it was April and not October, as I'm already counting the days to Scarefest
It's also to be noted that Ciaran's become still more amusing, and his oversized Dream Theater t-shirt shall only multiply this further. I had one too After the joys of Duel, we began the extensive trek to Oblivion (my pedometer is pleased to note we covered over 15,000 steps during our time in the park!) via the Haunted Hollow - which was useless owing to the fact that the thing in there which makes the best noise was broken. And it was light. C'est la vie. There was also the inevitable amount of amusing conversation which resulted from the group being as well-balanced as it was, and this continued well into the depths of a lengthy Oblivion queue during which in-jokes with Maddie had me in hysterics on a number of occasions and bad music and bad people were severely spited. Rocco? Whyyyyyyy? As for Oblivion, well, it went up and then it went down again rather faster - there was excessive mist and a certain amount of joltiness, which happily blotted out an assortment of Northern screams.
The two best coasters in England had been thoroughly appreciated, and some zombies had had the **** blasted out of them - the day was going extremely well, but how to improve on this? It being 1PM, the answer was obvious; lunch at the Woodcutter's Grill
While Benin's overtaking strategies prove he thinks he's Kamui Kobayashi, Rach is awesome, and in exchange for my slight detour in the morning (and associated brush with death) bought me lunch - this involved JD glazed ribs, and ****ing amazing ribs they were too, untainted by Merlin's genetically modified tomatoes unlike nearly everyone else's food appeared to be. As soon as I'd managed to rid the table of mayonnaise and coleslaw and acquire the all-important vinegar, feasting could begin. I stand by my comment that there's nobody in my phone book worth interrupting those ribs for, such was my enjoyment of them (Tom similarly enjoyed non-driving; it meant lager could feature), but Furie eventually managed to track us down, then went to enjoy a picnic involving pasties, caramel shortcake, sausage rolls and the requisite red drink by the fountain outside. At length, 4 sighs of full-stomached contentment ensued, the lingering JD sauce was wiped from a pair of mouths, and we went outside to join them. Ciall and Maddie were also outside, talking about Nickelback, Biffy Clyro, Pendulum, Manchester United and far too many additional sins to mention. This displeased me, and justice was swiftly delivered. Unfortunately, while I was preoccupied shunning the non-believers, Th13teen had felt fit to close, adding further fuel to the fires of my displeasure - it wasn't October, but myself and a few others were still quite looking forward to meeting the other one-drop wonder again. I wasn't looking forward to Rita however; so we didn't go on it, and the world was nearly as smiley as it had been when I was confronted with my rackofribs <3
Instead, Hex happened - a conversation on lacklustre horror films (it seemed impossible to find one Ciaran's small friend actually liked!) and quite a bit of shouting brought us through the now wonderfully short queue line and into the preshow room. More than one of us would continue to provide volume over the top of the video we'd all seen a million times, while I'd also disrupt the ambience of the vault, having found Maddie's tale of scare-actors promoting the 'Gothic Mansion #4' scent disproportionately entertaining 5 minutes or so after she'd told it
From hereon, Ciall began with his inpenetrable Inception quoting, leading to my own tales of semi-lucid dreaming, which threatened to invade the ride itself. The music was awesome, the ride was a lot of fun, and the expressions on the faces of first-time riders were priceless. Would now be a good time to mention that I like Hex, and I like Alton a lot.We emerged, blinking in the sunlight [lol, j/k...] a few minutes later, ready to decide what to do with the remainder of the afternoon. With Th13teen closed, options seemed oddly limited, and decisions were not forthcoming, so we began to walk in the direction of the piratey bit, and Maddie & Ciall decided to ride the splash battle. Bizarrely, it turned out that they were serious... and obviously the sun WAS peeking through at last, because I know I felt fit to get involved with the water cannons in a BIG way. There was disappointment with a lack of eligible people to thoroughly dishevel, though victimizing the one person who looked LEAST like they wanted to get wet proved an enjoyable strategy. Alas, there were also large men who were a LOT better with the cannons than me, meaning my jeans left the ride area sporting a level of wetness Mr. Kennett would have been proud of. Maddie & Ciall for their part were on the wrong side of the boat, meaning their follow occupants received a drenching intended for them. Meh. Honourable mention to the small child who'd thought to find a BUCKET, with which he was severely drowning hapless passers-by, Ciaran included; at least until he decided to leave the boat in order to do so. Silly child.
By now, I was more than wet enough, and decided that while it wasn't the best water-themed activity, Sealife was still preferable to getting any wetter on the Flume, so the group split, myself, Rach, Tom, Benin and Ciaran opting for fish based activities. Alas, my concentration span wasn't at its best today, so remembering the hilarity of May 2009 (while conveniently forgetting other aspects of it :evil
cleaner-shrimps were chosen over spider crabs of tedium. However, the cleaner shrimps were still more disinterested than me, none in any touch pool seemed to want anything to do with anyone's hands. And we weren't allowed to bother the horseshoe crabs, disappointingly. There were also fish, many of them, some of them jellyfish, and others small barracudas. A few moments post-GHOSTSOFTHESEA, the Sealife centre was left, and a fun game of shouting 'THAT'S not Maddie' at every boat which did not contain Maddie (and... there were many) ensued. There was also a Shawn Sandcastle to evade, alas. Many flume boats later, the group was reunited (sans Rach, who’d alas departed early after a long goodbye causing me to knock things over in the shop mid purchase of expensive diet coke) and an escape bid by Furie’s batteries following a pocket failure was thwarted by a surprisingly athletic Will!As though Ciall or a British Summer were dictating the routine, the theme of wetness persisted, and the Rapids were our next port of call, Furie alas having to sit this one out due to insufficient boat size. The queue was again lengthy, so people including but not limited to James Labrie, Megan Prescott, the entirety of Manchester and Ollie once more had to endure my verbal rampage. The ride, for its not inconsiderable part, delivered a satisfying level of dampness on my side of the boat, and rather more on the others – it also seemed to go on FOREVER, just as it had done at my second Alton Live precisely 6 years ago on Saturday.
Despite my loudly protested preferences, we went on the Mine Train next, and it had a queue of frustration. It’s better than Chessington’s (but not Europa’s, due to lack of spice cave) and thus even the brand of amusement provided by Benin, Maddie and Ciall’s insistence on having the front car could not go far towards redeeming it. ‘Mergh’ was remarked, and again, photos displeased. There were strange things in the shop, these included Furie.
Uncertainty took a hold of us once again at this point, until someone made the wise decision that Oblivion was the manner in which our day should end, and a long walk followed by a much shorter queue regardless of more useless batching (I forget the quote, but I know it was priceless!) and better ride (front row FTW) followed. Doubtless there were antics, but many of the group, myself were flagging by this point and thus my memories are alas as hazy as they are happy. Family_furie were met once again outside the ride, complete with smaller (and larger) people, and enjoying yet another picnic, which featured cornflake cakes. I’ve put far too much emphasis on food in this report, amusingly. Anyway, there was brief faffing with them before, flanked by Benin, Tom and Maddie who’d be joining me for a hair-raising return journey to the loathsome legions of Lee… (dammit) Stoke, despite Tom’s apparent desire to detour to Rhyl!
An upsettingly long queue for the monorail that I might not have been awake by the end by meant that walking was the way forward again until we parted ways with Benin at the other monorail station, and easily found the Clio of JOY in carpark F, booted up Emily and commenced a ludicrous trek to Stoke, which was spited by bus of SLOW, but greatly improved by Dream Theater, banter and Maddie moreorless falling asleep. Thinking about it, my driving instructor told me a standard at which my passengers were relaxed enough to fall asleep was one to aim for, so that one’s for you, Paul!
So, there you have it – I know I’ve skipped more details than I’ve included, and that wasn’t up to my usual standard (or length!!) but the day really was, and then some; in terms of random Alton meets, that might even compare to the legendary Halloween meet of 2009, and as I’ve set before, it was exactly what I needed to round off this weird and less than wonderful week in the wondrous world of Will. I have odd moments of wondering why I stick around this place, as it does my ****ing head in sometimes, but days like yesterday do more than remind me of why anyone trying to get rid the site of me is in for a long wait! The rides, brilliant though they were at the UK’s finest (was there anywhere British I’d rather have spent yesterday? Probably not) once more took an airtime-filled backseat to the company, so yet another resounding thank you to those that turned up (Yeah, even you Ciall, especially since you so admirably dispatched with Martyn!) and ensured the laughter and antics were as without end as they’ve been on any trip involving CF over the last 6 months. Lots and lots of superlatives for you, the park and the day, give yourselves pats on the back of awesomeness. 12 hours sleep last night was as enjoyed as it was due
This story ends where it began: Yay
I'll do a slightly better report then here, I think I'm allowed... I make up the rules, so yes, I am
We had one of those slightly obscure days. It started badly with discussion of "The Stafford Horse Trials". Madame_Furie says all horses always look guilty, so it's likely to be a verdict in favour of "The Pedigree Chum factory" for whichever horses are on trial.
Thankfully this week, nothing seemed to have to rhyme with Dalmatian, despite a Minor_Furie protestation.
This means nothing to anybody, which is good
Our first appreciation of the park (first visit this year for family_furie) was one of "OMG! HOW MUCH???" Everything is not just upsell, but it's all "ex VAT, you pay" and very misleading. "Annual pass only £80 (Ex VAT, you pay £100, only on a family pass with 2 adults and 2 or more children, possession of goat eating trolls will require an additional troll charge of £34.66 (Ex VAT) and eat uneaten goat an addition £23.45 (ex VAT) greener grass surcharge. Goat parking is additional to car parking at £3 per horn (or udder, whichever is greater) (Ex VAT)) All in tiny print underneath the signs.
The Fast Pass has been split down again too, so there are now 3 flavours of fast pass. To buy all three is £26 in total (not sure if that is ex VAT or not, I was too busy feeling light headed by this point). That would get you on the coasters (£20 for the coasters) and the water rides (including Charlie - £6).
Fortunately I had a Tesco Voucher for Maxi-Minor_Furie and the queues were efficient (except the confused families trying to work out which fats passes to buy on top of their already extortionate day out to buy their kids and still maybe be able to afford to eat for the year).
AP office was also whizzing people though, so I was soon ready for the Customer Services faff and to meet people.
It was great to see "New Look Will". I've not seen him since he started losing weight, and he looks great on it. Ciall, Tom, Rach, Maddie and Benin all drifted over and we set off, leavig madame_furie and Maxi-Minor_Furie to watch the frogs.
Everything has been pretty much covered. I spent the day bag ladying and taking photos, I think I rode Hex, The Flume and The Rapids. Oh, I snook a Duel in there actually with MMF.
Other than that, it was great to see everyone generally and had a really great day. Very light hearted and relaxed, all good stuff and down to generally excellent company (Minor_Furie clearly being an exception ).
Erm, what a bitty and random piece of writing...
We had one of those slightly obscure days. It started badly with discussion of "The Stafford Horse Trials". Madame_Furie says all horses always look guilty, so it's likely to be a verdict in favour of "The Pedigree Chum factory" for whichever horses are on trial.
Thankfully this week, nothing seemed to have to rhyme with Dalmatian, despite a Minor_Furie protestation.
This means nothing to anybody, which is good
Our first appreciation of the park (first visit this year for family_furie) was one of "OMG! HOW MUCH???" Everything is not just upsell, but it's all "ex VAT, you pay" and very misleading. "Annual pass only £80 (Ex VAT, you pay £100, only on a family pass with 2 adults and 2 or more children, possession of goat eating trolls will require an additional troll charge of £34.66 (Ex VAT) and eat uneaten goat an addition £23.45 (ex VAT) greener grass surcharge. Goat parking is additional to car parking at £3 per horn (or udder, whichever is greater) (Ex VAT)) All in tiny print underneath the signs.
The Fast Pass has been split down again too, so there are now 3 flavours of fast pass. To buy all three is £26 in total (not sure if that is ex VAT or not, I was too busy feeling light headed by this point). That would get you on the coasters (£20 for the coasters) and the water rides (including Charlie - £6).
Fortunately I had a Tesco Voucher for Maxi-Minor_Furie and the queues were efficient (except the confused families trying to work out which fats passes to buy on top of their already extortionate day out to buy their kids and still maybe be able to afford to eat for the year).
AP office was also whizzing people though, so I was soon ready for the Customer Services faff and to meet people.
It was great to see "New Look Will". I've not seen him since he started losing weight, and he looks great on it. Ciall, Tom, Rach, Maddie and Benin all drifted over and we set off, leavig madame_furie and Maxi-Minor_Furie to watch the frogs.
Everything has been pretty much covered. I spent the day bag ladying and taking photos, I think I rode Hex, The Flume and The Rapids. Oh, I snook a Duel in there actually with MMF.
Other than that, it was great to see everyone generally and had a really great day. Very light hearted and relaxed, all good stuff and down to generally excellent company (Minor_Furie clearly being an exception
).Erm, what a bitty and random piece of writing...
Nemesis Inferno
Strata Poster
furie said:
Is it wrong that I read this in my head in Will's voice?
Also, the Roam one <3
