What a fantastic weekend! Reading all these trip reports has put a big smile on my face, there were so many great moments <3
Day One:
Woke up at 3.30am on Saturday, after a nice evening spent scoffing Harvester Salad Bar and gooning out over 3D POV's at Ian's. Darren drove to the airport - his journey playlist featuring plenty of Enrique Iglesias to get us in the mood for Spain. We then met Nic at the airport, who was greeted by Darren and Ian in the sophisticated, continental way... of passports to the boobs!
Then we joined one of the longest queues of the entire weekend: the one for MacDonalds breakfast. Whilst other efficient MacDonald's staff ran around serving people, our queue stood perfectly still in the almighty presence of James Four Stars.
Despite being massively incompetent, he had four gold stars on his MacDonalds badge?! I wracked my brains and finally cracked this enigmatic code - each gold star represents his outstanding ability in the following fields:
1. Rudeness
2. Laziness
3. Inefficiency
4. Idiocy
After we had finally eaten, we had a giggle secretly filling up Ian's phone with some charming pics of ourselves; then met MouseAT and boarded the flight to Madrid.
Arrived in Spain, which was a new country cred for me, and there was faff aplenty with Conor having to dash back to central Madrid to get his and Jordan's passports, then the hire car only having 4 seats for 5 people.
Despite this, we still managed to arrive at Parque Warner an hour before Ian's car. Which gave us plenty of time to get chatting with the lovely people from P.A. Community.
Stunt Fall, the Vekoma G.I.B. was the first cred of call when we entered the park. It turned out to be more of a Stunt Fail - running the occasional test car, but refusing to open. (This strengthened my belief that Vekoma's are the diva's of the coaster world.)
For being so unreliable, this coaster rankes pretty highly on the MacDonald's Star Scale of Crapness. Each star represents the dissapointment it has given to goons throughout it's intermittent coaster career.
So, we marched onward to Superman instead. What an amazing coaster. It definitely puts the 'super' into Superman. You could even say it's a flawless floorless.
The drop, the dive loop, the zero G were all stunning, and it had a surprising amount of airtime for a B+M multi-looper too. One improvement would have been some music in the station, but who am I to expect themeing at a theme park.
Superman Atraccion De Acero doesn't have any stars on its MacDonalds badge, because it is actually good.
Next up was my first Batman: The [strike]Leak[/strike] Ride. The themeing in the Batman queue is more extensive than Superman's (ie: it actually exsists), I was quite impressed by it. The queue featured dark rooms with neon graffiti all over the walls, similar to the style of Tim Burton's Batman films. This did make the ride look a bit outdated in the context of Christopher Nolan's recent efforts; but I really liked it. Tacky > subtle > no theme at all. And they had used the CF font for the ride text! <3
Sat at the front, and the ride was a complete blur from the moment we left the lift hill. It's easily one of the most intense roller coasters I've ever ridden. I enjoyed it, but didn't have any urge to re-ride it.
On the MacDonalds Star Scale of Crapness, Batman only gets one star for it's lack of re-rideability.
Complicated fast food, and dancing around to the park's fab Western show followed. The log flume decided to spite us, so instead of crying over non-spilled water, we opted to ride the notorious woodie: Coaster Express. (No relation to Chessington's Scorpion Express, I'm told.)
There was a lot of talk in the lovely sunny queue about how rough this coaster was going to be. I think the sheer extent of it's roughness is what made me enjoy it so much.
Unlike Falken at Djurs or Grand Nash at B.P.B., Coaster Express has no nice moments that lull you into false sense of optimism. Coaster Express knows it's disgusting and tries it's very best to be disgusting 100% of the time.
Coaster Express also scores full marks on the MacDonalds Star Scale of Crapness, each star representing the millions of boobs it has caused to bounce as it relentlessly slams around the track.
But seriously, I can't remember the last time I've laughed so hard on a coaster. It really was something else <3 I kinda liked it, in a masochistic way.
Next up was the Tom Y Jerry Picnic coaster, which was the most pleasurable cred I've ridden
Aside from offering sheer vibratory bliss, it also has lots of cute themeing in the form of giant food and ants.
It receives one star on the MacDonalds Star Scale of Crapness, for being over too quickly..
The afternoon was plagued with downpours, so we did the obvious thing and rode the ACME rapids. They were similar to Bluto's Barges at I.o.A., lot's of water pouring in the side and plenty dumped on unsuspecting heads too.
I rode with some non-English speaking members of P.A.C.; and the squeals of laughter this ride caused from all of us transcended any language barrier. So much fun!
Rain faff occurred, so we rode some dark rides: the unremarkable Scooby Doo shooter and the amazing Vekoma Madridhouse.
I couldn't contain my excitement as we entered the indoor queue for the excellent spooky-themed Madhouse, because they had the moving eye portraits on the walls! Just like the ones that the old Haunted House at Alton Towers had!
Candelabras, cobwebs and eerie music built up the atmosphere, before a fab pre-show with talking stone heads that reminded me of Knightmare (the tv series, not the dead cred.)
The fireplace exploded, and bookcases suddenly and mysteriously moved, but the story didn't end there.
The centerpiece of this Madhouse was a long dining table with a dead animatronic woman sat at the head of the table. (She was probably a member of the Earls family.) There were also screens at the side and gaps that were meant to look like cracked windows, but they ruined the illusion as you could see the drum spinning the room through these gaps.
I still thought it was a brilliant ride though.
Me and Sue then did the horror maze, which was a real mish-mash of characters and themes. It began with vampires, then had possessed-girl-on-bed, man in werewolf mask, a few more forgettable characters, and finished predictably with chainsaw man.
The highlight for me was that they have used the exact same sound effects as The Asylum at Thorpe for their own asylum rip-off corridor.
There were a few jumpy moments, but it certainly didn't put the maze into amazing.
We dashed over to Superman for one last ride, which was a great way to end the day.
In conclusion, Parque Warner looks very 90's, but they were the best decade (after the 80's...literally, and figuratively, speaking.) It's a fairly decent park, but I'm in no rush to return because the only outstanding rides were Superman and Batman.
Meeting P.A.C. was great, because they 'got' CF and they fitted right in with all the silly fun we have. (Like walking around the park singing the Colossus music!) All in all, it was a fab day <3