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A Thorpe Park homage to Gavin

Darren B

Active Member
Today myself, Ian, Jordan (crap shorts), jj23w, Sarah and ATTACKHAMMEH headed off in the search for creds.

We found a city park on the outskirts of London which according to RCDB had 7 coasters! We wandered around the park for a bit doing cultural ****...



We found PANDAS! and participated in #enforcedfun


No surprise here that the creds were located in the corner of the park, dumped on a slab of concrete. ****!


First up we rode the fish and X, followed up with a naughty back row ride on Nemesis Inferno.

After NI we headed over to Colossus...

NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! It was **** ****!

Next stop; Food. We ended up at the BBQ place.



After lunch we hit up the Angry Birds 4D cinema before.....STEALTH!

It was fab.

Before taking a cheeky ride on Swarm a few of us got WET on Tidal Wave


Swarm;


Saw was the last coaster of the day...


Me and Ian didn't bother riding. Instead we enjoyed some PANDA time!



After a successful day of coastering we gathered for a selfie;

Said our goodbyes and **** off home!

I'll leave you with...

<3

Thanks for reading!
 

jj23w

Member
Great day out. The Swarm is the best at the front the right ill write a report in a minute need to change out of my still WET clothes.
 

Ian

From CoasterForce
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So yeah, I spent a day at Thorpe Park wearing a panda mask and being bummed by NHS Jordan. Some might say it was a perfect day.
 

gavin

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Ha!

At least it's proof that people actually read the **** ing things!
 

Jordanovichy

Credit Whore 2016
Ahh so so fab.

It was a really enjoyable and relaxed day sauntering around Staines' best theme park. Finally made it to my nominated park for LoG this season!

For me the day started with a bit of drama which ended up in me feeling like Sue and arriving 40 minutes late. I stayed the night at Nealbie's. After going to bed at god-knows-what-hour-of-the-morning I awoke to bacon <3. At 7:30 I caught the DLR at Cyprus to Canning Town where I switched to the Jubilee Line and went to Waterloo. Time was tight and I HAD to catch the 8:15 to Exeter (I'd get off at Woking). After massive faff trying to find where you buy the tickets I made it on board with moments to spare. It was a couple of minutes late which would prove disastrous.

My train to Chertsey was going to leave Woking at 8:52...It was going to be tight even if the train had arrived on time. 8:53 my train arrived, I legged it to platform 3 but there was no train. I asked someone and according to a national rail guard who checked in his book the train never even existed. I've never missed a train before and ironically I said to myself that day it would happen eventually. There wasn't another train until 9:52 so I'd have no lift from the chief goon from Chertsey meaning I had to walk from Chertsey to Thorpe Park, a 40 minute walk through villages, and along dual carriageways I'd never been on. I walked through a quite picturesque area though



I made it to Thorpe, never before has the entrance been such a welcome site



I had never seen the car park so full and the park had only been open half an hour. I thought we'd be in for a day full of queuing. I dropped my bag and sleeping bag with ATTACKHAMMER's parents in Bar 360 or whatever it's called nowadays and headed off to where I could smell goons. I found them waiting outside X. They'd already done it and Flying Fish. We had a mince towards the 'new for 2014' Angry Birds Land! Woooo...



It was such a half arsed job and it was genuinely disappointing. There were a few plastic pigs around and the surrounding buildings have been painted awful pastel colours.











What got me was how little effort Merlin/Thorpe have clearly but into the whole thing. Everything is plasticy and false. It won't last 5 minutes...especially with the clientele the park usually attracts ;)

Take this TNT. It's basically a block of metal/wood with a sticker on, there is no shaping, no depth, or anything, it's just a **** sticker and, in the words of hot Jordan, it's **** ****.



There are two new rides, Angry Birds 4D experience...



...and the King Pig's Wild Hog Dodgems...



We didn't do the dodgems but I really rather enjoyed the 4D experience. I'd never been in the 4D cinema when it was whatever it was, before I became an enthusiast and all that. The 4D effects were generally samey, there was a lot of seat tilting and flying forwards but the film itself was very enjoyable and I thought the effects worked very well. I like to give credit where credit is due and the 4D experience deserves it.

We headed over to Inferno, we only queued for around 20 minutes. I was disappointed the vapour feature wasn't on but it was riding really well just like it did all of last season. Colossus was up next, thankfully they were running both trains so the queue was pretty bearable despite it being 40 minutes long because it moved quick. It was probably the worst ride I've ever had on the Intamin looper. It was just awful, it threw me around and made my ears sore.

We fancied a bite to eat and so hit the Calypso Bar. With my left over coleslaw and Ian's rib bones he made a Masterchef style dish to feast your eyes on.



We then did the 4D experience which I spoke about earlier before heading over to Stealth. I thought I'd be a man and hold my arms up for the first time and I'm pleased to announce I did. jj23w had never done anything like Stealth and the sound he made when the train left the station was something we all had a good laugh at.

Darren, ATTACKHAMMER, jj23w and I decided on Tidal Wave next. I didn't ride it last year so was looking forward to it. Thankfully the weather was decent because believe it or not we got wet!



In the distance we could see Slammer was operating! Welcome news as it is the best flat in the park and was rumoured to be down for the whole season.



People weren't allowed on it, it was just testing but it was still a good sign that it might be up and running again soon.

We headed over to Swarm Island to ride the wing rider. I love The Swarm. Bite me. It just rides so perfectly. I never find the left side of the train as enjoyable but it was still fun nevertheless. We only queued around 10/15 minutes. The last coaster of the day was Saw with an advertised wait time of 60 minutes. BURRRRDEN. jj23w needed the cred so we sucked up the PAIN and queued. Darren couldn't be arsed and had some panda loving with Ian as you have already seen.

It was bleugh as usual. That is all.

Darren scarpered leaving the rest to have a Swarm reride, before we made it Ian decided to scarper too leaving just 4. I got my favourite seat, front right on the outside.



It was absolutely fantastic. I'd forgotten just how fantastic it can be. If every seat was that forceful, smooth, orgasmic and enjoyable as that one seat it would overtake Air as my number one. Again, bite me.

And that's about that! We said au revoir to jj23w and made our way to the exit. I saw Thorpe Shark (groan) Hotel for the first time.



And they've erected a MASSIVE screen at the front of the park.



And that's just about that. Thanks to everyone for a fab fab fab day and sorry for being a burden to start! Thanks for reading. :)
 

DelPiero

Well-Known Member
Jordanovichy said:
In the distance we could see Slammer was operating! Welcome news as it is the best flat in the park and was rumoured to be down for the whole season.
People weren't allowed on it, it was just testing but it was still a good sign that it might be up and running again soon.
I spoke to GS on thursday to try and dig a bit of info out.
They told me that all the parts have arrived and are being/have been installed, but the engineers are at the beginning of the testing process. This is why there will be 2 days of tests followed by nothing for a week or so.
They also told me that there is currently no staff that are trained to operate the ride, meaning that they need to train main console ops and standard ride ops before opening to the public, and this won't be done until the engineers give full sign off.
No date was given to me, of course, but they said they will keep working on it and hopefully it will open this year.
 

ATTACKHAMMER

Well-Known Member
I won't be writing a report but I'll post my thoughts on the new 4D show.
The film shown is decent and is fun. But the effects are far too similar and there is no variation. Overall I give the new 4D show 6 out of 10.
 

Ian

From CoasterForce
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CBA to write a full report (you've read it all before!). It was nice to meet jj23w and spend time with the established goons.

I've written a review of ABL here: http://t.co/tP8TziWhrF
 

jj23w

Member
Yup a fun day out highlights had to be my expression on stealth and getting soaked the second time thanks guys.
 

jj23w

Member
Ian said:
CBA to write a full report (you've read it all before!). It was nice to meet jj23w and spend time with the established goons.
What's my nickname lol sorry for double post.
 

Ian

From CoasterForce
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^ I was thinking, because you're so thin, 2D Jordan?
 

Ian

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^ Jolly Postman Ian...? Did I miss something? Why?
 

AJ

Active Member
Ian I shall now call you mufflepuss. Because it sounds like your kind of name.

You shall be my mufflepuss.




...Mufflepuss.
 
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