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furie

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So, Furie has to go to Hastings on short notice. That's fine... I miss the family and it's a pain, but it's a free night in a hotel with free steak dinner and free beer - can't really complain too much.

On the way down (started out about 2:00 this afternoon) I'm making great time... I suddenly have a thought.

Thorpe is only ten minutes off the beaten track... I wonder if I can actually get to ride Saw: The Chore?

A plan formulates in my head. If I can get to Thorpe before 4:30, then I'll give it a go. Having a plan, I take the furiemobile up to a tonne and race against the clock to prove my abject Thorpe fanboyism!

Including a poo stop at Oxford, I get through the gates of Thorpe at 4:20! Excellent.

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Thorpe, on its side - hurrah for mobile uploads

First port of call is guest services. I reckon that after a 300 mile round trip on the "enthusiast day", they owe me an exit pass just to get on this bloody thing.

I wander down to guest services and there are two lovely ladies just waiting for somebody not to moan at them. I explain my predicament, and they're very sad - they can't give out Saw exit passes. Only the ride can do that in the case of a breakdown.

I'm very sad.

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The "I'm at Thorpe sad face"

I may have cost myself 20 minutes on the way to Hastings...

The delectable Louise comes to my rescue though. They do have a system for special cases (the are fewer special cases than furie ;) ). They can write a mum's note on some Merlin letter head. "Please excuse furie from having to queue" kind of thing.

The wonderful (have I mentioned she was kind, polite, gracious and a shining example of female kind and her friend was equally as excellent?) Louise does so and points me in the direction of Saw: The Ride.


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My note to teacher. It says "Please let furie skip the queue, he's really fab and deserves it"

I'll have to leave it there until Orange decide to send through the next set of pictures... Dun, Dun, Duuuuurrrrrrn!
 
Hurrah! The ride is running... Erm... Empty trains.

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Oh dear… The “this is not good” look

This isn't looking particularly good actually... I've already seen hundreds of trains running with nobody in them - I want to actually see people.

Look, people leaving the queue

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Don't go! I'm here!

People sitting down???

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People sitting down in a queue means "very broken - just leave now"


So, what to do? An announcement. "Saw is broken - time unknown. If you want to leave the queue then go back the way you came". I can't! There was an accident just North of Heathrow and the M40 is impassable!!!

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

I wait...

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Scary waiting furie pose

Gladly, the ride is only closed for sick removal. Ten minutes and I'm heading to hand over my note to teacher.

So that was it then. Finally got on the ride then... Hurrah and all that :)

Then it was time to join in the M25 traffic jam.

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None of these cars are moving

So I take the opportunity to sing along to the "I don't have to go to Thorpe again" song.

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#No I don't have to go, no I don't have to go, no I don't have to go to Thorpe again. Not no more, not again, not this year, or the next. No I don't have to go to Thorpe AGAIN!!!!#

Guest Service count x 1 lovely visit.
Ride count 1 x Saw.
Queue count 2 x hours on the M25
Not having to go to Thorpe again? Priceless! ;)
 
One of the best reports I've ever read!
 
Clearly :lol:

I enjoyed the trip and writing the report anyway :)
 
What I like about the report is that it's silly and staged without being "freakin' awesome silly and staged."

Well done, have a lollipop.
 
Lucy said:
I also like the fact that furie's wearing a suit - very smart indeed :)

I do it five days a week - it's not that special.

However, the gate staff just let me through for wearing it :)
 
My Nan asks if she could have her glasses back please.
 
I want an excuse letter as well :( I sent them two e-mails, one telling me they will forward it (to which I received no response, so I assume this was not forwarded) and another which gave no response.

Epic report though, Phil :p
 
Ian said:
My Nan asks if she could have her glasses back please.

Is she Dame Edna?

Never pick glasses when a two year old is screaming in the opticians and then you ask your wife if they're okay! :lol:

Just go and turn on the water works Ciall... In a suit! :p
 
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