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Where do Sheep go for Vacation? - UPDATED

Cu-BaAaAaAaAaAaAaA. Haha I'm so hilarious. Anyway yah here's my Cuba trip report.

So, having like two months to save for some sort of trip, I really only had the option of an all inclusive vacation. Not really my idea of a great place to go but for $600/each (which included the resort, flights, alcohol, food, and entertainment/sports), you can't really go that wrong. I won't include too much detail or too many photos because I guarantee I'll get like one comment on this entire report anyway.

DAY 1-3

We left to Toronto on Saturday around midnight (so Sunday I suppose), and the ride there went smooth. I say that because I got to sleep the whole way there. Once we got to the parking lot, we took the shuttle to our terminal, had a parfait, sat down and waited. I was hyper but as it was four in the morning and my boyfriend had just driven for four hours, he was not so pleased with how wired I was. We boarded our A320 and were on our way at the stated time of departure, which was 6:45. I was nervous because the airline is Cubana, which I had never heard of and the plane was dirty as all hell; however, it ended up being one of the smoother flights of my life.

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My boyfriend couldn't resist the wine, so he had three glasses. And by glasses, I mean plastic cups.

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For being ghetto as heck, the sandwich was relatively decent but the cheese looked sketchy so I took it off, which really broke my heart.

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Soon enough, we were in sunny Cuba.

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Most people go to Varadero but we chose Holguin which is on the south/southeast part of the island. I was the offiical Peso baller.

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We had an hour and a half bus ride to the resort which was a mild burden after a four hour drive and a four hour flight, but it gave us a glimpse of the countryside.

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We arrived at Club Amigo Atlantico in a short while and were greeted by an extremely rude front desk staff, who were the worst people we met during our stay. They were all pre-occupied with everything but giving proper customer service. Even after half an hour when it was finally our turn, the dunce at the desk kept going off to chat to others who had cut the line or whatever. Then, we upgraded and had to wait another hour and a half for the room. BURDEN. Not a good first impression but thankfully the entire trip wasn't like that.

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Instead of standing around griping, I look my luggage to the lobby bar like the official champ that I am.

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It was at the lobby bar that I realized the "cocktails" are not very cocktail-y. They're more like all rum, with a tiny splash of something else. This was my "pina colada."

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Finally, we got our room. Nothing special, but we upgraded and therefore we had a room that was not stinky, was in a very good location, and most of all, had a hair dryer. Yes, I'm such a girl.

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View. Okay, so it's just a tree and a crap pond but whatever.

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We then went to check out the pool.

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The pool turned out to be one of my favourite places on the resort and the swim up bar was pretty cool.

There was also a snack bar near the pool which had fab undercooked hamburgers; however, they often ran out of their snacks which was sad.

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We checked out the beach, but because it was Sunday it was pretty packed.

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I got hungry so buffet times occurred. Not the greatest food in the world but certainly edible and it didn't make me sick. Plus, there was a lot of rice and beef, both of which I love.

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After a few more drinks we were really tired so we went to bed even though it was pretty early. Too long of a commute drained the both of us. Since we went to bed so early though, we got up at like 6am ready to swim and such.

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It was certainly not the official struggle to get a drink anywhere, especially when you tip well!

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We had cigars. As in, my boyfriend smoked them and I had one puff and died.

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SILLY ME.

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We went to yet another snack bar where I met an old man named Roberto who really liked to talk... A lot. And that's coming from someone who never shuts up. Sadly it was the only food place open on the resort at that time (buffet had certain times and the rest were a la carte/closed snack bars) so we waited forever for a burger.

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Sadly, I ended up being the official allergy sufferer which put a damper on the rest of the day and also made it be an early night again. Our schedule ended up a bit weird, going to bed quite early and waking up really early but it worked out.

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I think we also actually checked out other parts of the resort after our food, including the hilarious laugh inducing concrete ghetto goofy golf.

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The other pool was pretty nice.

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Chateau Amigo (a wine tasting place) ended up being our favourite place at the resort but we didn't discover it until Thursday when we actually went in.

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Next day was same old. We relaxed, smoked cigars, drank, ate, and swam.

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Casual diaper near the pool.

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We got a free catamaran ride with our booking company, so we took advantage and went on it!

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It was a really good time and also hilarious watching people get splashed.

Casual rum and Coke on the boat.

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After our Catamaran ride, we went back to the hotel and chilled some more. There was more culture the next few days, but I'll get to that tomorrow.

NEXT UP- Jeep adventure tour, horse and buggy rides, and dolphin swimmage.
 

furie

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Re: Where do Sheep go for Vacation?

LiveForTheLaunch said:
I won't include too much detail or too many photos because I guarantee I'll get like one comment on this entire report anyway.

Well with that kind of attitude, I'm certainly not going to respond...

Bollocks.

Cigars are fab, but there's a definite technique. Not that I would condone a holiday where you just spend all the time sitting around drinking and smoking - such a waste :p
 

furie

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Re: Where do Sheep go for Vacation?

Oh, and when do you get to Baaaaaaabados? :p
 

furie

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Re: Where do Sheep go for Vacation?

I'm still trying to get my head around an all inclusive holiday where you need to tip...
 
Re: Where do Sheep go for Vacation?

Cigars are fab, but there's a definite technique. Not that I would condone a holiday where you just spend all the time sitting around drinking and smoking - such a waste

Yah I tried to do as many excursions as I could afford off the resort because I'm a restless person and it was basically the actual struggle to sit and relax. But, once again I only had $600 and that's about all I could afford at the time since we had the guaranteed week off and I don't know when I'll get time off again. I could have never stayed at the resort the entire time but even with the excursions, there was very little culture involved so it's not "true" traveling. I HATE when people act like they're the ultimate travel bitches when they ONLY go to the tropics! It's like no, you've been to maybe 10 countries which is a lot but you've only seen resorts.

I hate smoking anyways so the cigar was lost on me. I'll post an update after work tonight.
 
Re: Where do Sheep go for Vacation?

DAY 4-5

So the next day I was up at 5:30 in the morning for our jeep adventure tour. Although it was $80, I remember some of the excursions I did in the Dominican being the highlight of my trip so I had no problem paying a bit considering everything else on the resort was free, and it was a chance to get some culture in. Needless to say, any kind of early start to the day is bad for my relationship considering we're both not really morning people :p After a short bus ride we were at the place where we pick up the jeeps.

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We were all suppose to get to drive our own jeep, but then this stupid French family of five decided they needed three jeeps, so they moaned and whined and offered the tour people like $50 to take our jeep away from us. So we ended up having to ride in the back of the tour guide's jeeps, which was kind of depressing but I tried not to let it ruin my day. As we drove through the countryside, I got a better glimpse of what Cuban life is like and it was pretty sad.

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We arrived at our first stop shortly after, which was the marina for some boat action!

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We got into our speedboat and we were ready to go!

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Sadly, as soon as we pulled away from the dock, the speedboat stalled and stopped working, so we were transferred to a jet ski. I didn't want to ride the jet ski at first because I'm scared of water and it seemed more risky, but I'm actually glad we got to use that instead.

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I basically felt like the official Batman.

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After the boat ride, which we loved, we got back into our jeeps and drove around some more. I was stoked that the French people got stuck in the mud (despite the blondie being a cuuuutie).

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After that dilemma was over, another dilemma began. We drove through a very wooden jungle thing with the windows down, and a spider landed on my leg. Thankfully the one on my leg compared to the one on my tour guide's leg was small, but it still scared me really bad to the point where I cried.

Next was a Cuban farm.

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I LOVE coconuts <3

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We got to see them make coffee by hand, and then we got a cup of it and as a person who doesn't drink coffee, I thought it was really good!

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Then we went on an ox cart ride which was fab!

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The ox cart ride was short, but then we mounted our horses and went on a horseback ride, which was terrifying because my horse was an actual psycho and kept attacking the other horses.

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The destination of our horseback ride was the place where Christopher Columbus landed in Cuba in 1492! Pretty cool stuff. I took a totally romantic photo :p .

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We had lunch in the Christopher Columbus spot, and our lunch place was on a bit of a hill so we got some really nice views.

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I had some of the best fish of my life.

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The last stop on the tour was Bariay, an Indian village that I believe was settled around the time of Columbus.

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PENIS FERTILITY STATUE.

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They were giving away free shots there for whatever reason, and were selling like, a mickey of rum for $1 so of course my boyfriend bought one.

The people there did a pretty cool traditional dance that eventually we all got to join in on. Mah mannn filmed it and I wish I had the video because I look like a complete dork trying to dance with them.

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When we got back to the hotel we just lounged around by the pool and went to the buffet. The excursion was really fun and well worth the $80 that we paid. Sadly we never got to drive the jeep but I was never going to drive anyway because I can't drive stick!

When we woke up the next day we realized it was payday so we went to the bank. On the way we met a fine gentleman with a horse and buggy taxi. He offered to take us on a one hour tour of Guardalavaca for only ten dollars so we obliged! Oh, random car picture because I love the cars there.

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I don't know how the Cuban people cope without air conditioning!

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Our driver, Miguel, stopped at the side of the road and we were wondering why. He then jumped down a massive drop off, then climbed up a tree. He was basically turning into Tarzan! Eventually we realized he was getting us mangos, which were DELICIOUS. I'm not a mango fan but these fresh ones were so good despite the fact it got stuck in my teeth everywhere.

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After our horse ride, which was quite fab (we also got to give some local kids candy which I thought was really awesome), I got back into my bathing suit and went down to the pool.

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After lounging for a bit we decided to take a walk along the beach.

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Once I got underneath my umbrella, I was starting to realize that maybe the four drinks I had in the span of forty minutes was not the best idea, considering how strong they are.

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When we were done at the beach we went to the pool for the daily volleyball game. I had a few more drinks before it started but washed them down with a burger thinking that might counteract the alcohol. I was wrong. This was the final photo taken of me before I went back to my room in a sick and drunken stupor. </3

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A few hours later I woke up to a note saying "downstairs reading and having a drink in the lobby. Feel better." THANKS BOYFRIEND FOR STAYING WITH ME WHILE I BASICALLY DIED :p . I was still feeling really sick at that point so we decided to just take it easy for the rest of the night. I watched some TV and listened to some of the little concert thing they were having in the lobby, which I could hear from my room. I say concert in the loosest of terms because it was basically just a woman singing, but she was really good.

NEXT- DAY 6-7
 
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