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Rank the Thorpe Park coasters


Strata Poster
Stealth - 2nd best ride in the UK for me (after Nemesis, obviously). Launch is one of the best out there.

Nemesis Inferno - Close between this and Swarm, but I like the speed and intensity of the B&M inverts a bit more.

The Swarm - This is a very good coaster, and very close behind Inferno.

The Walking Dead: The Ride - We're into forgettable territory now.

Flying Fish - Meh. Better than the other two.

Saw: The Ride / Colossus - I can't even be arsed to rate these. They're both horrific. Colossus due to it's age, Saw due to it's lumpiness.
This, but I do not hold NI or Swarm in such a high regard.


Strata Poster
1. Swarm
2. Nemesis Inferno
3. Stealth
4. Colossus
5. Saw
7. Flying Fish

...writing this post has made me remember why I've not been to Thorpe since 2015...


Hyper Poster
1. Saw
2. Stealth
3. Nemesis Inferno
4. Walking Dead (Lights Off)
5. Swarm
6. Colossus
7. Flying Fish
8. Walking Dead (Lights On)


Roller Poster
1. Stealth
2. Swarm
3. Nemesis Inferno
4. Saw
5. Colossus
6. Walking Dead
7. Flying Fish

Saw and Colossus could easily switch though. ;)


Mega Poster
1. Stealth (Probably my second favourite UK coaster after the Big One at BPB)
2. Nemesis Inferno. (Really good, probably not as good as Nemesis but it seems smoother but both easily got beaten by Black Mamba for me, the close proximity encounters are mental and ending in complete darkness is stunning)
3. The Swarm (Again really good but I prefer Fenix at Toverland, that one has a nice airtime hill after the first drop)
4. Colossus (Decent coaster, great little hill after the loop, nice hangtime in the endless barrel rolls, but terrible train and restraints, will be interesting to see the Flamingo Land version next year. I think with newer trains this ride would be much better and operations would improve)
5. Saw (I actually think the theming is quite decent and well done to incorporate the movie stuff. Bit short. Maybe a second lift hill and some more indoor stuff would have sorted that)
6. Walking Dead (Probably least interesting indoor coaster I've done. Decent theming and actors but is not really sustainable long term that approach I reckon)

Never been on Flying Fish.


Roller Poster
  1. Swarm - My first big coaster, the first drop is super fun and I love some of the interactions. Shame about the length and how tight the vests can be.
  2. Stealth - Short but sweet, the launch is fantastic and the airtime at the top is great if hampered a tad by the restraints.
  3. Inferno - A solid if unspectacular ride, it's got some good forces, it's super rideable and swooping through the mist is great when they have it on full blast but it does feel like it ends about halfway through.
  4. Saw - I can get fun rides on this and the pre-lift section is great but even on good runs I feel like I need an aspirin afterwards.
  5. Walking Dead - NWO was one of my least favourite experiences on a coaster, but I did genuinely love the rave edition of X. This I like, but mostly ironic. I always end up laughing non-stop on this, but I can't seriously put it much higher.
  6. Flying Fish - It's not the most thrilling but when it's a walk-on it's a fun way to kill a few minutes
  7. Colossus - Rides like this sort of remind me how much we've been spoiled by the newest generation of train designs. The constant head-banging, lack of legroom and the way the restraint thighcrushes during the quad roll really brings down what would otherwise be a fun layout with solid path interactions. The way the area has aged doesn't help either, unfortunately.

There's certainly a theme with some of my critiques.., not the best lineup but not terrible either an I feel that if they were joined by a proper star attraction, the park would have a really strong coaster collection. As it stands, it's decent but I could see so much more from Thorpe.


Hyper Poster
1. The Swarm - Love this coaster and one of my favourite things at TP
2. Stealth - Awesome launch etc!
3. Inferno - Love Inferno too and always have a great ride on it - especially the back row of course!
4, TWDTR - I'm also a TWD fan so I like it for that reason too.
5. Colossus - not overly smooth now apart from the front row but not as bad as Saw in my opinion!
6. Saw The Ride - Not aged well unfortunately and is now really rough which is a shame as it's themed really well and has a good layout.
7. Flying Fish - fun kiddie cred :)


Roller Poster
My Ranking (haven’t done Walking Dead: The Ride yet because my visit was a week before opening)

1. The Swarm: Really like the Theming, some nice Near-Misses and also some intense parts, especially for a wing Coaster. Furthermore, I definitely enjoyed the Dive Drop and the Inline-Twist, but the ride could be longer.
2: Stealth: Short but Sweet. Really intense launch, one of my favorites. Solid Airtime on the top hat and Airtime Hill. Could be longer and would be better with lap bars but an awesome ride.
3. Saw - The Ride: Expected nothing going in and was definitely better than expected. Really enjoyed the indoor part, unexpected airtime and a solid inversion. The drop was good and the Airtime Hill before the MCBR provided awesome ejector air. It wasn’t smooth but not unenjoyable rough. It was down most of the das but opened 30 min before park closure, so credits to Thorpe Park.
4. Nemesis Inferno: Worst B&M Invert I have ridden but good interactions and the Theming isn’t bad
5. Colossus: Also better than expected, the quadruple Heartline Roll is awesome. Other inversions are mediocre and the first half isn’t smooth at all but a solid ride.
6. Flying Fish


Mountain monkey
Staff member
I went to Thorpe yesterday, so writing this list while my memory is still fresh:

  1. Nemesis Inferno. I had a real hard time deciding whether to place it or Swarm first, but Inferno wins due to its theming, lovely foliage and path interaction, plus the fact that it isn't miles away from everything else. It's a great fun, snappy ride, although I experienced some headbanging when I rode in the front. The restraints also felt very rigid and unforgiving, making it difficult to breathe - but that's probably the fault of my diet rather than of the designers. Easy on the chocolate, kids, it makes coasters worse in the long run.
  2. Swarm. As mentioned above, it's just below Nemesis Inferno. It has great views from the lift hill, the wing rider position is very fun, it interacts well with its theming and is very smooth, but it also feels short. When the first set of brakes come up, you think "ah, yes, it's time for a little breather now before we meander back to the station", but then there's just one turn and the ride ends. And I'm really no fan of the "catastrophe, everything is destroyed" theme. It just comes across as a half-assed excuse to skip on maintenance of the area.
  3. Stealth. Second for second, it's clearly the best ride in the park. But those seconds are so, so few. You go "Launch - wheee!" to "Over the tophat - wheee!" to "Flying into the brakes - wheee!" and then the ride is over. Very fun all the way, but also very short.
  4. Saw. I'm no big fan of horror (and again with the "abandoned" theme, which means an excuse not to clean or paint anything), so I feel like I rank this lower than it could have been. Then again, its placement relative to the other coasters feels right anyway. When there's an 8/10 above it and a 3/10 below it, it doesn't matter whether I rate it a 4 or a 7. Heck, I don't even do numerical ratings. I just didn't particularly like this one. A decent layout but with some headbanging, and not much force to it. Its drop was surprisingly weak too. As if it needed a holding brake. The lift chain just whipped us over the top and then we were down before I could take in how tall or steep it was. It gets bonus points for the hilarity of Jigsaw giving ride instructions, though. You can just imagine him in a colourful cap and T-shirt, calling out the kids who try to bring their phones on the ride. Or calling a mechanic when the ride breaks down, in that voice.
  5. Flying Fish. I actually kind of liked this one, but will admit that Saw is probably the better coaster. Some points off for turning left throughout the entire layout, except one turn near the end. Then again, the transition from left turn to right turn gave a pretty sharp jolt, so perhaps I should be thankful for it sticking to one direction most of the time.
  6. Colossus. From the painful restraints to the painful restraints and the painful restraints, this was not very fun to ride. My thoughts summed up as I was riding:
    (In the station): "Ouch, I'm pretty clamped down, or what? Perhaps it will be better when the ride is in motion?"
    (On the lifthill): "Nope, still painful. But hey, the ride could be enjoyable."
    (First drop and loop): "This isn't too bad?"
    (Approximately halfway through the cobra roll): "Ouch! Ouch! My ears! Any my thighs!"
    (Through the corkscrew): "I know there's one more of these! Oh no, make it stop!"
    (Going into the barrel rolls): "Four more to go... Three... Oww, owww! Ah, heck, I forgot there's one more after the turn! Please, couldn't we go straight to the station without this faff?"
    (At the end brakes): "Get me out of this thing!"
    Plus, it manages to look like it hasn't been painted since 1997, which is quite a feat seeing as it was built in 2002. I'm willing to bet this will be the first ride Thorpe puts on the chopping block if they ever need more room.
N/A: The Walking Dead. As I said, not a big fan of horror.


Strata Poster
1. Swarm
2. Nemesis Inferno
3. Stealth
4. Colossus
5. Saw
7. Flying Fish

...writing this post has made me remember why I've not been to Thorpe since 2015...
Lots of people are wrong and have Stealth first :D

I have now visited Thorpe ONCE in the last six years - my list is much the same, though I'd consider switching Saw and Colossus and didn't dislike The Walking Dead, though that could have been down to tiredness and circumstance.


Mega Poster
1. Stealth - it goes fast...and I like that. Simple pleasures.

2. Nemesis Inferno - a smooth and intense ride which has grown on me.

3. The Swarm - close behind Inferno, it's a great ride, but it lacks the chaos of Inferno.

4. The Walking Dead - I enjoy this a lot actually. It's fun and quite well themed really.

5. Saw - sore

6. Colossus - rough

7. Flying Fish


Roller Poster
7) Walking Dead (Top 80) - cannot stress how much better X was.
6) Flying Fish (Top 70) - needs no introduction, really.
5) Swarm (Top 25) - fun, but short and locking vests. This used to be over 10 spots lower when it had an apocalyptic bounce in 2020.
4) Colossus (Top 25) - it's alright, not the worst thing in the world.
3) Stealth (Top 15) - nothing to add, just a good ride.
2) Nemesis Inferno (Top 10) - relentless and ridiculous, but ends quickly.
1) Saw (Top 5) - it's not rough, it just has character. Love the Dive loop.