Well, first you go to the store, convenience or grocery, doesn't matter, find the potato chips section, if in America, and select the desired flavor. After being a contributing member of society and purchasing the chips, proceed to your mode of transportation. If the excitement is too much to handle, just wait, the highlight of your day is coming!
Enter your living quarters, dim the lights, draw the curtains, light some candles, turn on some smooth jazz and get comfortable. Just remember, once you pop that top, the fun WILL NOT STOP! Take that little plastic top and throw it across the room, where you're going, you won't need a mother **** lid!
Slip that index finger under that aluminum papery seal of desire and place your thumb on top. Pull that slowly off as the compressed air releases and you are smacked in the face with raw flavor. Inhale, then inhale again. Slide your grubby little fingers in there, because at this point, you're desire matches Harry Potter for some ginger.
Pull one chip out, as if you are removing the top card from a deck to be that asshole to cut the deck with one **** card. Slip that mofo in your mouth, enjoying the processed flavors of that factory in Indonesia or wherever the hell they are making Pringles.
Then, for the next 45 minutes, you will look up old Pringle commercials and pretend you are in them, eagerly putting it on vine or Instagram, panning to people who you tolerate the most, but still can't stand. After realizing all that remains is crumbs, you lift that tube up and drain those last nibbles in your hole like its nobody's business.
As you pick the crumbs off your shirt like a crack addict, rubbing extra seasoning on your fingers, dying for another hit, you swear you are done with the stuff, yet....
Once you pop, the fun don't stop.
